Monday, October 29, 2012
It Took All That Sin To Learn
Obviously, there is no excuse for sin of any kind. However, we all do things we shouldn't do-myself included. In fact, I fell to the opposite extreme that I used to be within the past 10 years.
However, in all of my new sins never committed when I was younger, I feel it was the only way to truly understand what others go through-what makes them turn to certain wrongdoings. It was also the only way for me to get a grasp on what keeps people tied to their addictions.
For me, it was a matter of feeling trapped and hopeless for awhile, as if there's no way out except down. It also was a case of trying to find a quicker path to relief from emotional pain. It also is a way of escape from stress and a method of forgetting about life for awhile. However, it was also the pride of thinking I was too good for the path I eventually walked down-never thinking I would.
I'm not yet speaking this from the perspective of a person who has conquered certain sins. However, I have faith to believe it will happen. I gave up the fight for over nine years with several failed attempts to repent and turn back to God. I still stumble and fall quite frequently, and can even be considered a hypocrite to some people.
Still, I know it's better to keep trying than to just give up completely. I will get there. It has already taken me years to get to the point where I am and as a result it's easy to lose faith and hope. But I will get there. God told me I would.